Have you ever started a blog and after a few years (or maybe not even that long!) realized that you’re not writing about things that truly fuel your passions? It’s happened to me before and it happened again recently! In fact, the feeling caused me to stop writing here at all – it’s been over a year since I put up a new post. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to write, it was because I wasn’t sharing the things I care about anymore. And it’s exactly why I wanted to start blogging about allowing yourself to be happy. Here are some ways this blog will start to look different going forward and help YOU allow yourself to be happier too.
- Why is allowing yourself to be happy so taboo sometimes, especially as we get older?
- Determining what makes your happy
- Tips and Guides
- And more to come!
Let’s dive in!
Why is allowing yourself to be happy so taboo sometimes?
Depending on where you fall in the age timeline, you may have already noticed this. In fact, it can start as early as in your 20s. Sometimes it feels as though – out of nowhere! – people have these expectations that you are going to drop the things that have made you happy in favor of “growing up,” whatever that means.
Do any of these sound familiar?
Why are you still pursuing that dream? Isn’t it time to start being realistic? When are you going to get your head out of the clouds? Is that hobby really suitable for your age? Don’t you think it’s time you stop listening to that music/watching those shows/enjoying these games/etc etc etc ad nauseum?
It’s weird. Maybe there’s some sort of magical switch, something like a light switch, and it’s supposed to flip to the off position once you hit some arbitrary age. When that happens, you’re supposed to suddenly change your tastes and your interests and your pastimes to fit whatever box it is that we’re meant to live in.
But why? I don’t think there’s an expiration date on happiness. Instead, I allow myself to enjoy things that some people don’t understand.
Here are some personal examples. Such as music.
I listen to K-Pop. Like, constantly. The last time I listened to an English song, it was definitely an English release by a K-Pop idol. The last time I listened to a North American artist? No idea. I just love K-Pop and it’s what I enjoy hearing. This is cause for a lot of scrutiny and mockery apparently. I don’t understand it because I don’t mock people for enjoying whichever artists they love, even if I don’t care for them myself, but something about K-Pop just opens the floodgates of judgement.
And what I find entertaining.
I love to watch horror movies. It doesn’t matter if they’re jump-scare movies, demonic possessions, hauntings, serial killers who won’t die, gorefests, whatever. If it’s scary, I want to see it. I will not only watch them, I will then debate whether those movies followed vampire or zombie lore, or branched out – and how I feel about that.
Speaking of zombies, I am a zombie fanatic. I discuss The Walking Dead as though the characters are people I know in real life. I will discuss zombie survival techniques to the point that you’d think the apocalypse was actually upon us. Any time I’m out in a public space, there’s a good chance I’m considering escape routes and pondering, if a zombie sauntered in right now, where would I go and what can I use as a weapon?
I’ve also recently (unsurprisingly) gotten into K-Dramas and Korean movies. The quality of the shows and films are unbelievable, and many of the shows are just about movie length for each episode. That means you can really sink into the storytelling and character development. I can’t wait to share some of my favourites here on this blog!
Dreams I still have.
I love to write fictional stories. I’ve completed two full novels, one being a ghost story and the other being a portal fantasy. I have a list of approximately 265 writing prompts that have popped into my head, all in the “what if?” format. I have dreams of being published and seeing my books on shelves in the stores.
A language-learning passion.
My love of K-Pop and K-dramas has (perhaps unsurprisingly and inevitably) led me start learning to speak Korean. I’ve taken classes to learn Hangeul – the Korean alphabet – and to learn some basic conversational phrases. I have notebooks stuffed with study material. I enrolled in a full semester university course for September 2021 so that I can continue learning. I’ve compiled ways to study Korean for free. It’s challenging but exciting and fun and rewarding. However, more than once I’ve been met with a raised eyebrow. I get questions as to why I would bother learning a language I am unlikely to ever need to use, living in Canada like I do.
Start allowing yourself to be happy. Love what you love.
All of these things – and many more – bring me happiness and joy. They don’t quite fit in to what seems to be expected of someone in their 40s but I don’t care. I’m not sure what a woman my age is meant to love and pursue as hobbies or dreams, but I don’t fit that picture, whatever it is.
And that’s okay. I’ve learned a long time ago to stop feeling guilty or embarrassed about things I enjoy.
I’ll bet if you’re honest with yourself, there’s something that you love – a type of music, a hobby, a passion, whatever it may be – that someone has looked down on, that someone has suggested is not meant for you. And I’m hoping my blog can help you shrug that off and pursue it anyway. Because inevitably we all have a finite amount of time in our lives, and I do not want to waste mine by not letting myself enjoy those things. Or worse, wasting that time by hiding what I love out of shame or embarrassment.
It’s okay to ignore judgment and start allowing yourself to be happy. You deserve that. We all do.
So here’s where this blog is pivoting
What if you’ve pushed your happiness so far away that you don’t even know what brings you joy anymore? Or what if you don’t know how to fit in things you love with your busy life full of adult responsibilities?
Well, my plans for this blog – and just like the things that bring me joy, this blog is not stagnant and will continue to develop and grow – include a desire to show you that you CAN live life with joy without feeling weird about what you love. I also want to shout the message that your interests can change and grow. I’m still learning about myself. K-Pop and learning Korean are both things that I have only discovered in 2021, so there is also no expiry date for discovering new things that excite you.
I want to share my language learning journey, music that makes me want to get up and dance (and I do!), and open my life up to anyone who wants to read along.
Beyond that, you can expect tips and guides to things that may spark an interest for you or help lead you to your own discoveries. I want to you allow yourself to be happy. The best thing is, tips are often transferable. So while you will definitely find specific resources that I’m using to help myself learn to speak Korean, I will also be sharing ways that I am making learning a new skill easier, and that can be applied to almost anything you want to learn.
And after that? Well, we’ll have to see what develops next. Meanwhile, let’s follow this path of joy together and see where we end up!